Question 1

Will you co-officiate?

Accepted Answer

GLADLY! But let me share my very personal thought on that matter…I completely respect and gladly serve any couple who feels the importance of having two officiates, and I have happily and successfully been a co-officiate. However, in some cases, the presence of two officiates could give the perception of a division of faith. What I believe to be remarkable, however, is when one officiate can blend two faiths, with grace and meaning, bringing a true sense of unity to your ceremony. Either way, it is my pleasure and my honor to serve my couples, in whatever way they wish to be served!

Question 2

​Can we create our own ceremony?

Accepted Answer

Absolutely! I am your facilitator. You hire me to perform the wedding YOU want to create! I am your guide. I help you understand what each component of a religious or spiritual wedding entails, and you choose how you want to incorporate it. I guide you through the order of the ceremony, and to help you envision your wedding, exactly the way you want it to be.

Question 3

Our family structure is complicated, how do we handle the processional?

Accepted Answer

Many families today are mixed, and the relationships are often blurred. We discuss all the people you would like to include, and I have many innovative ways to include the people you love, creating a ceremony that highlights love and harmony. No worries or stress allowed!

Question 4

How will you get to know us?

Accepted Answer

I schedule regular sessions, meeting with you at least two-three times before your big day, and have you complete very in-depth questionnaires, so that I am able to really connect with you on many levels. When your guests leave your wedding or ceremony, they will feel as if we have known each other for years!

Question 5

​Do we need a rehearsal?

Accepted Answer

Most of the time – no. Rehearsals themselves are rather outdated. Your coordinator and I will have everyone prepared as we line up, and each person will know exactly where to go. But if you wish to have one – feel free!

Question 6

We do not belong to a synagogue, where can we have our ceremony?

Accepted Answer

Anywhere that accommodates the number of people you wish to have! Most of my families hold their lifecycle events at hotels, restaurants, private homes, on the beach, anywhere you want!

Question 7

We are not religious, but we want to include a few traditions that are meaningful to us.

Accepted Answer

You are not alone! Today’s couples want a personalized wedding that reflects who they are, without the obligation of outdated rules and traditions. Our traditions of our faiths have beautiful modern meaning, and your ceremony can be whatever you want it to be. I support and guide you through the process by incorporating the meaning and clearly explaining to all your guests, so everyone feels welcome, and an active part of your special day.

Question 8

What makes you different?

Accepted Answer

Your ceremony is the most important part of your wedding, and it is of utmost importance for your officiant to set the tone for your event. I am warm, loving, personal, spiritual, dynamic, and flexible. I have exceptional speaking skills, a loving heart, and add lots of fun to your ceremony!

Question 9

Also, and this is one aspect is very important that most couples do not think about...

Accepted Answer

Unlike many officiants who book multiple weddings a day, I commit to only one event per day. This ensures I can be fully present and flexible—whether there’s bad weather, traffic, or a late guest. Your ceremony is my sole focus, and I’ll be there with you until it’s complete, without the pressure of rushing to another commitment.

Rabbi Brian Denker

About Rabbi Brian Denker